Ugh….

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These are on the desk accross from me and THE ONLY thing keeping me from eating all if them is that $18 asos dress.

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Ugh….

image

These are on the desk accross from me and THE ONLY thing keeping me from eating all if them is that $18 asos dress.

Tagged

ideas…..

The thing you have to know about me is that I have either THE BEST will power or THE WORST will power. For example I can either eat no candy or all the candy; specifically, I ate no candy atallperiod for 3 years once I broke that I ate literallyasinliterallynotslangfigurativlyliterally 20-30 mini snickers and twix in one sitting. I am an all or nothing lady.

SO! This does not work well for eating healthy because I can’t just eat healthy MOST of the time with the occasional indulgence. It has to be ALL of the time periodnoifsandsorbuts. You know whats hard? Eating healthy ALL of the time periodnoifsandsorbuts.

The only thing I love more than an indulgence–totally what I am calling all crap food from now on so it is classy–are prizes. I love prizes! All kinds of prizes, cheap and expensive! I love them!

SO if order to get on track for only healthy eating I am going to give myself prizes. Instead of staring longingly at a cheap dress on Asos I am going to set up a system wherein I can get that cheap frock as a prize. WIn win because if I actually DO this then I will fit in that cheap dress. AND if I get that dress or whatever prize then I will post a picture of it with me here!

So STARTING TOMORROW! After 1 week of no indulgences (no doughnuts, cookies, chips, etc.) I can get this Asos dress

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If I have no indulgences for 2 weeks starting tomorrow, I can get these H&M sports tights that I really super want:

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IF I make it 3 weeks from tomorrow with no indulgences then I get to get this VS sweater dress I’ve wanted for awhile:

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Thats a lot of prizes but the total is under $100 and would be a good jumpstart to get me going. After this initial 3 weeks then I can do longer goals with maybe some better prizes and cross some larger ticket Items I’ve been needing–what if, I should not even think about it–I even planned a long long term on to get a new camera!!!

struggles….

Susie is 7 Months old today! 7 Months!!!! She is fucking amazing and I cannot believe I love something as much as I love her. She ate chicken–I cannot believe I have a being that eats chicken! It seems so weird!

As happy and content as I am with work, W, Susie and Henry, I am having struggles…with my weight. At first the weight just fell off but with starting work and being exhausted and parenting and stopping breast feeding I gained weight back. I never did reach prepregnancy weight either so I am frustrated. I eat pretty healthy especially while not at work. I think its time I realize I am a middle aged woman, post pregnancy, with a job that I love but that is high stress. I have EVERYthing working against me. I have to not only exercise and eat healthy–I have to eat less; a lot less. a lot lot less. At home I can do this but it will be hard at work. BUT I have plans which, for the time being, I am going to keep private until I actually lose some weight. I still haven’t ever done that before–purposefully, intentionally lost weight. I have to admit that I am not sure that I can–scary! 

So if I say NO to things in the near future–candy, lattees, doughnuts. Please don’t give me a hard time–its super hard as it is.

It is here to that I want to say something–I am super frustrated with all those super trendy mommy bloggers who eat junk food all the time and are the size of tooth picks. I am sorry but that is annoying and ridiculous. I know only 2 people read this blog BUT if I ever review a doughnut or something like that again I will also put how much weight I gained and what sort of insane junk food binge it led too. The one thing I know is that sugar leads to more sugar 🙂

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pants eulogy….

photo (21)Today, just now, I threw away my favorite pair of jeans. Aptly described as boyfriend (soft well worn and comfortable) and pictured above.

I broke a bottle of Valentina–smashed all over the kitchen floor and splattering all over the front of my jeans.

I knew the jeans were heading to the end. The crotch was wearing thin and growing holes–not in the trendy grungy way of this year’s style.

After they got covered in Valentina I knew it was time and put them in the trash. Its weird throwing something you wear so often in the trash. I know its just clothes but also an outward representation of what I am; I feel like there should be some sort of ceremony.

Anyway–Cheers pants! I will miss you! You got me through a lot–beach trips, car tips, airplane trips, sad trips where I wiped tears [snot] on my knee, pregnant times, baby times, drinks, hangovers, yard work, and good tv. You will be hard to replace and well missed!

wednesday night confessions….

I am terrified of starting work again on Friday. Its not leaving Susie–she will be with W. I am scared I won’t be the nurse I was before.

 

cold elixir….

We have colds..except for Susie. Crossing my fingers she doesn’t get it. She hasn’t been sick yet and I am terrified.

People debate a lot over what is best for colds. Sleep and no stress are the best cures in reality BUT I am a fan of a good aromatic elixir, ie a great burbon hot toddy.

So here is my recipe which just alters the original a little.

Burbon Hot Toddy

1 thin slice of ginger minced

1 cinnamon stick or equivalent in powder form (1/2 tsp)

pinch of pumpkin pie spice

2 shakes (1 tsp) red chili flakes

1/4 shot burbon of your choice–I like Makers. This is for flavor and aroma not for drinking drinking!

1 tsp honey

1 large wedge lemon

1 orange wedge

12-16oz boiling water (I always go big on the water–currently drinking a 20ozer)

Inhale vapor and your sinuses will clear, drink when cool and I hope you feel better soon!

land of extremes….

Sundays at the park (Echo Park) are some of my favorite times. We stroll around the lake eating amazing food. Dinner for Wesley and I last Sunday was $6.

Yesterday, I went to get my hair cut in Koreatown at my fav hair place. I had some time to kill between errands so I stopped by ohsotrendy Larchmont Village to try a new coffee shop. Single Americano and a doughnut (granted the doughnut was amazing, the Americano was not–no crema) $8.25.

Dinner $6, Coffee and a doughnut $8.25

Seriously the land of extremes.

workout….

There are so many of these sorts of articles.

How about we just say WORKOUT.

Its fucking hard enough as it is.

SIDENOTE: People are hard on the eliptical–as someone with crappy knees–I like it. Maybe it is not the best of the best for working out BUT I can do it for an hour while watching TV at a gym. Sometimes, the ability to watch TV while working out is the only thing that makes exercise achievable.

wednesday night confessions….

I FORGOT!

I hate it when people clip their nails (toe or finger) on the couch. Same with flossing. I am a firm believer that both should be done in the bathroom–and am very vocal about it. I hate the sound, the action, the debris.

I will always yell at W when I find an escaped clipping or floss; DESPITE the fact that I do both, on the couch, when no one is looking.